Whether you’re just launching or you’ve hit your first 7 freakin’ figures….this imposter syndrome bullsh!+ is real for all of us at one time or another. What’s worse is that even if you’ve overcome it once before, that lil wench finds a way to sneak it’s way back into your life.

Am I right??

Questions like “Who TF is going to want to work with me?!?” creep up when you’re not looking. Usually when you’re about to hit “publish” on the landing page for your new flagship offer.

Now this ish happens to most of us, but as women of color it seems to happen a hell of a lot more. It’s been engrained in us that we’re not good enough. That our culture, ethnicity, our mannerisms, or our looks (anywhere from the color of our skin, to the red lipstick or big ass earrings we love to wear) just aren’t mainstream enough for anyone to want to buy from us. We need to “bland” it down to seem intelligent and legit.

There are a few things I do to keep that ish at bay, especially when I’m trying to go full force on my goals. I want to share these with you, especially one thing in particular.

To start this process off, you need to remind yourself you started your business because you have a talent you want to share with the world, to help enrich lives, and it feels damn good when you do so! Do you journal? Honestly, I don’t journal much. However, I’ve started getting into the habit of making sure I have several small journaling notebooks around for all kinds of things. When you need to remind yourself of the value you’re adding to people’s lives, grab a little notebook, and write out your talents and your why’s. Write it out and say it out loud to yourself.

Next, DO NOT compare yourself to absolutely anyone! OMG this ish is hard. You start checking out your competition and notice they’re successful in doing things completely different than you, and you start doubting your own process, ideas and talent. But what you don’t know is that some of these people out here are just faking it. They have no clue! They just happen to have a nice looking website or landing page. Yet there’s nothing behind it…no process, or system, or true intellectual property. Or you’ll look up someone in your field that you know for a fact is very successful, and you start feeling teeny tiny because you’re nowhere near where they are. And that’s ok, because once upon a time they were just starting out as well. It doesn’t matter how successful they are in your industry, because do you know what you have that’s going to make you just as successful?? You girl! It’s your authenticity.

Which leads me to my next point. Regardless of how many competitors you have, you do your services better. Your services have your talent, and your flavor and your awesomeness. There are clients out there that want what you offer way more than anyone else’s services, because they can relate more to YOU! They love how you explain things. And that is so much more valuable to them than whatever it is that other person is offering. Remind yourself, constantly, that it is your authentic-self people want. Your people will find you and gravitate toward you if you keep true to yourself.

You’ve Accomplished SO Much More Than You Know

Remind yourself of all of your accomplishments, whether they’re big wins or small wins that somehow seem insignificant right now. Believe me they’re not, they add up. You’ve had accomplishments way before you started your business, and those count too. They count because wins in other areas of your life add to the value you’re offering now. So if today just sucked, and all you did was able to get out of bed, maybe make the bed, brushed your teeth and washed your dishes….those are all accomplishments. Life is effin’ hard, and sometimes it hurts, and we think the only valid accomplishments are to be raking in 5 or 6 figure months, and that’s total bullsh!+. We need to give ourselves credit for the small things in life too. Be grateful you were able to get up and do just those little things sometimes because there are other people in the world that can’t even do that. Tomorrow is another day that may have more small wins, but may also have some huge wins! Don’t downplay anything. Write them out, big or small, in a little journal.

Tell Your Inner Critic to STFU

This next part is my favorite. Not only because it’s helped me with that dreaded imposter syndrome, but it’s also helped me in other super important areas of my life. I have learned to tell my inner critic to simply STFU, in a nice way, of course. LOL

We all have negative self talk at one point or another. Some of us deal with it way more than others. I had been searching for a long time for a way to reprogram my brain to have positive thoughts flow easily and to not have immediate, reactive negative self talk (there was some deep rooted ish there). There are 2 easy methods that I was finally able to learn for my reprogramming.

The first was to write down any negative thought I had, at that moment, and then underneath it, write another statement showing compassion and understanding towards that negative thought. This one was the hardest, because remember I mentioned earlier that I’m not huge on journaling. But it works!

This second method is my favorite. I named my inner critic. I named her Hot Mess Virg (my middle name is Virginia). And Hot Mess Virg was showing up all the effin time! Freakin’ downer. But just like with the journaling, I learned to show her compassion. When Hot Mess Virg had something to say, like “You suck at this”, I would talk back to her. I would call out Hot Mess Virg by her name, tell her to shush, and say something that shows her compassion and understanding. This writing here, more than the journaling, has reprogrammed my brain in a way that I can now almost immediately shush Hot Mess Virg before she finishes her negative statements. Which is huge, because not only would she show up for my business, but she always had something to say about my marriage, about my parenting, about my body, and every other aspect of my life.

I’m not going to lie, girl, this ish gets hard sometimes, and it does take time to build the new habit. Hot Mess Virg and imposter syndrome still show up, by no means am I perfect. However, I’m now able to tell them to “STFU I don’t have time for you right now”. Remember you are deserving of living the life you envision, and remember you are FIRE.

Throughout most of what I mentioned, journaling came up. It doesn’t have to cost you a lot. Go to Ross and get some cute $4 notebooks, and use each one for different reasons. You don’t have to write a book for every entry, unless you want to, but instead just jot down some quick sentences to get things out of your head. Pick a couple of things I mentioned above that feel right, implement them into your life and push through!

Keep slayin’ it mama…you got this!

xoxo,

~ Christelle

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